Unleashing Conscious Curiosity

Posted on July 28, 2010 by jeffcaliguire

Sure, curiosity killed the cat.  (“And many guys I know may respond… and is that a bad thing??”)  But I believe that human curiosity is far underrated, too little nurtured and often left unfostered.  One step further: Might unleashed curiosity actually be the most valuable method to turning the mediocre performer into the outstanding leader, creator, worker?  I believe this is the case. 

Think of it:

  • No curiosity: No “new world”
  • No curiosity: No lightbulb
  • No curiosity: No airplane
  • No curiosity: No space program
  • No curiosity: No computers
  • No curiosity: No internet… no web pages… no social media… no blogs!

Curiosity leads to paying attention… which leads to asking questions… which leads to study… which leads to experimenting.. which leads to new knowledge.  Heck, before you know it someone’s turned ordinary vanilla into Cookie Dough and even Cotton Candy!  Yum!

Yet, most ignore curiosity as naive.  As inconsequential.  As unacademic.  Little or nothing is done to proactively discover or foster curiosity.  So Thomas Edison is told by teachers that he’s “too stupid to learn anything.”  He gets fired from his first job for being “unproductive.”  And Walt Disney similarly gets fired as a newspaper editor because he “lacked imagination.”  How many other curios kids, teens, employees and even leaders today are forced to stay in track with the system when their genius actually lies in their curiosity. 

Think about it:  how many teachers do you know who intentionally help students discover and release their curiosity?  How many pastors to this for those they lead?  How many bosses take the time to discover and encourage the curiosity of those on their teams?  “Who has they time for that?” they might say.  

So listen to the hard statistics of  the consequences of squelched or unreleased curiosity. 

  • After just 10 years, 80% of college students are working in areas totally unrelated to their college major.  (Despite the $100,000 + paid by their student loans and their parent’s second mortgages!)
  • 70 % of American workers experience “stress related illness.”
  • 34% of American workers think they will “burn out” in the job in the next two years.

On the other hand: According to Thomas Stanley’s research in The Millionaire Mind, the number one distinguishing characteristic these millionaires say predicted their success: They were “doing something they LOVED.”   Might they have been curious about something?? 

In Proverbs 22:6, the Bible exhorts parents: “Train up a child in the way you should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.”  As Dan Miller writes in his book 48 Days to the Work You Love, “A truer reading of the original text could be ‘ Train up a child in the way he/she is bent…‘ The challenge of parenting is to discover how God has uniquely gifted this child and how the parent can help the child excel.” 

So, instead of asking: “What do you want to major in Joey?”  Why not ask:

  • What would you do if you were free to create anything you wanted?
  • What problem(s) would you solve if you had the power to solve it?
  • What bugs you that doesn’t seem to bug other people?
  • What gives you a lot of happiness, that others don’t get as happy about?
  • What intrigues you about the way things work? 
  • If you were given a billion dollars, and had to give it all away to just one cause over the next week: What cause would you give it to?
  • What are you doing when you tend to lose track of time?  What else?
  • If you could only read books on one subject for the next year: what subject would that be? 

Just curios here: What about you?  What would you do differently if you were able to fully tap into your own curiosity?   Might now be your time??

www.JeffCaliguire.com

Add to: Facebook | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumbleupon | Reddit | Blinklist | Twitter | Technorati | Furl | Newsvine

Filed under: Calling, Creativity, Inspiration, Leading from Inside Out, Personal Growth | Leave a Comment »

Stop Your DRIFT

Posted on July 12, 2010 by jeffcaliguire

I fully believe it’s the case that people who clearly define their life mission, vision and values (MVV) are the happiest people on earth and have joy independent of circumstances.   They know what they do best and they do it regularly.  They make a clear difference in others as well.  

 However, even those with a clear mission still live in a “blustery world.”   We still feel tugged, distracted and tempted away from what we want most.   Like my car  in fierce wind and rain storm a few weeks, ago, life has a way of blowing, luring or derailing us from what we say we want most.   Can you relate to a bumper sticker that says, “Mission Drift Happens.”  We start out wanting to value “family” and we get sucked off course.  We determine to utilize our strengths in our work and we find ourselves getting pulled into other activities. 

Here are 5 ways to overcome DRIFT and prioritize your own mission. 

1. Discuss Your  Mission, Vision and Values (MVV) with others you trust.   (Of course, this assumes you’ve defined your MVV.  If you haven’t yet, what’s keeping you from this?)  But, there’s nothing  like sharing what you really want with at least one other human being to keep us honest with ourselves and accountable to do what we say.  You may even want to have those who know you best critique you in it.   Do you have someone you can share your mission with? Who?  

2. Review Your  MVV Regularly.  To do such review, you need to keep it somewhere you’ll see it.  Frame it and put it above your desk.  I know one friend who laminated it and put it in the front of his day planner.  (Yes, he still uses paper.  It works for him!)  The key is to overcome “out of sight – out of mind” mentality.  And evaluate.  How did I do this week?  Are the decisions I’m making consistent with my values? 

3. Intentionally say “No” to the Good.   As its been said, “The biggest enemy of the great often is not the bad.  It’s the good.”  That means you’ll need to learn how to filter out what’s good and what’s great.  You’ll need to know when to NOT listen to others who don’t get who you are and what you do.   Just a few days ago, a man my aged told me how he turned down the most lucrative job he was ever offered in favor of engaging his calling.  “I have no regrets at all!” he told me enthusiastically.  And let’s face it, for some of us, closing doors is even more excruciatingly difficult than opening new ones.   However, if we don’t free our time, space and energy for the great, we may never get there. 

4. Focus on the Great.  In other words, do what it takes to get better at what you’re good at.  Don’t pursue improving your mediocre abilities.  Gain mastery and put the time into what you can be great at.  Yes, it still takes hard work, practice and time.  But, as you doggedly pursue your greatest gifts, you will find your confidence growing and your impact increasing. 

5. Trust the growth process.  As has been said, “Few things are created and perfected at the same time.”  Your mission, vision and values statement will take time.  It’s a picture of the best you.  If it doesn’t stretch you and challenge you, it may be too easy.  A vision should challenge us.  Values should motivate us to work at it.  Rome wasn’t built in a day and neither will your vision. 

We can Stop our DRIFT.  We’ll just need to be intentional to do so.   The results will be worth the work!  Do you believe it?

www.JeffCaliguire.com

Add to: Facebook | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumbleupon | Reddit | Blinklist | Twitter | Technorati | Furl | Newsvine

Filed under: Uncategorized | Leave a Comment »

Choosing Between Two “Economies”

Posted on July 1, 2010 by jeffcaliguire

I love asking myself and others the open-ended question: “What would you do if you had all the time and money in the world and you knew you couldn’t fail?”  In my mind, this question quickly taps into our passions, our heart and even our callings.   Have you ever seriously considered this question?

However, the pushback I frequently hear from many (and sometimes myself) is “That’s just not the way the ‘real world’ works!”   The mindset: “In a world of bills to be paid, time clocks to be punched and money to be made, you can’t live that way!”   Also, this is a world of bottom lines, success, failure, feast or famine.  Besides, “many in our world can’t even feed themselves, how dare we think of asking such rich-people questions!!”

The results – many end up stuck between two worlds, or as Os Guiness phrases it, between two “economies.”  The “calling economy” and the “commercial economy.”  The former says “do what you are,” “listen to your heart,” “live your dream,” “embrace your calling,” “do what God made you to do.”   The latter says, “calculate the opportunity costs,” “time is money,” “invest to get ahead,” and “do what gets the biggest bang for your buck.” 

I would argue that BOTH of these worlds are the “real world” - even though one side or the other might argue that only one is truly what matters.   Having served as both a pastor for more than a decade and on ”Wall Street” as a financial industry for almost a decade, I fully believe that one should both ask the calling questions AND calculate the amount of life insurance necessary to protect our love ones.  We must ”save our lives by losing it” AND save for college.  We must be  responsive to continually navigate to what we’ve been born to do and be responsible to continually navigate to do what we’ll be broke if we don’t do!    

HOWEVER – When it comes to choosing between the two “economies,” I believe the former (the calling economy) must outweigh the latter (the commercial economy).   “Put down your nets and follow me,” said Jesus.  The fisherman did just that and history records the impact.   “Don’t die with your music still in you,” said Oliver Wendell Holmes. In the real world, there is a bottom line beyond the bottom line.

Consider if the “bottom line” was the only thing that really mattered – there would be:

No Mozart’s music: He was rarely paid for his work (unlike Salieri), died practically penniless and was buried in a pauper’s grave.

No Van Gogh’s paintings: He too died in poverty, uncelebrated and rarely recognized.

No Mother Theresa’s loving impact: She actually served in practical obscurity among Calcutta’s destitute until GK Chesterton wrote about her and introduced her to the world.  How many, many more are out there doing this kind of “commercially irrelevant” work with no recognition at all? 

No Tom’s Shoes: How ridiculous to think that a company could survive by giving for free half of its shoes to the poor?

No country called the United States: Why would these “founding fathers” work for free and risk their necks by going counter to the most powerful empire of its day?(England)  What commercial gain was in it for them? 

Imagine a better world in which a college student didn’t JUST choose majors based on where the best teachers were, didn’t go to work in an industries because it was an area of “future growth”  or accept offers simply based on higher pay and benefits but instead discerning people guided and asked him or her, “What are you meant to do?”  “What is your true calling?” “What would you do if you could do anything?” ”What is God calling you to?”  Then - they took seriously their answers and helped guide them along those paths. 

I still believe the product of such a “dream economy” will result in GREAT GOOD.  It will be great good for the fortunate ones who answer the call and ultimately for all of us who call this planet our home.  And here’s a little secret… Such action would likely produce an even more authentically productive economy since we know that 80% of workers are currently dissatisfied with their “jobs” and 60% of workers are now looking to leave as soon as the economy improves.  The calling economy is the one I dream I’ll get to see in my lifetime.  (But if not, it’s still worth pursuing!)  Would you join me in this pursuit??

www.JeffCaliguire.com

Add to: Facebook | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumbleupon | Reddit | Blinklist | Twitter | Technorati | Furl | Newsvine

Filed under: Calling, Career, Dreams and Dreaming | Leave a Comment »

The 5 “Stay Stuck” Addictions

Posted on June 30, 2010 by jeffcaliguire

Truth be told, most of us have more untapped positive potential than we care to admit.  We’re not living the life of our dreams… We’re not being all we can be.  We’re not ”free to be me.”   Sadly, most of us cave in, or continually give in to some form “stuckness” that ropes us back our relationships, our callings and careers and even authentic spiritual lives.    Finding our mission, or not finding it won’t matter if we can’t address the underlying issues that keep us stuck. 

Call it a bad habit.  Call it stuck place. Call it a vice. Call it an addiction.    As any addict knows, the first step is admitting we have a problem.  We’re not in control.  We’re stuck.    Might you be suffering from any of these 5 “stay stuck” addictions?  (I confess.  I am.)  They may “present” in drinking too much, eating too much, sleeping too much, gambling too much, etc…. But, these are the deeper issues that keep us from living our callings. 

1. Addicted to People Pleasing:  Do you obsess over what others think about you?  Your parents?  Your neighbors?  Your boss?  Your friends?   When we do so we seek validation that “I’m OK” because YOU think “I’m OK.” (And I’m NOT if YOU don’t!)  Whether that drives us to buy stuff we don’t need and can’t afford, avoid doing what we’re good at because it goes outside the norm, or keep up with the Jones’s, the addiction can crush us.  Just think about what most people say is their greatest fear?  Public speaking.  What’s the real fear behind it?  (What YOU think of me!)

2. Addicted to Family Patterns: Do you do the same thing that your parents did….even though it didn’t work for them!!  Do you accept ceilings on your potential because your relatives didn’t achieve or succeed?  Do you accept false belief systems because ”that was how I was raised?”  The key is exploring what Mom or Dad did or told you that and  you realizing that it just isn’t true.   It’s OK to blaze a new trail!  You are not your parents, your siblings or even your ethnic roots. 

3. Addicted to Past Loss: Did you receive a blow that rocked your world and now seems to keep you stuck?  Did you lose a job?  A loved one?  A marriage?  A child?  An opportunity?  Yes, there’s a need to grieve what could have been and maybe should have been.  But, are you willing to give this the power to now control your destiny and take you down with it?  Might it be time to move on, even reinvent “you” who you are, can be and must be?  Not victim, but victor.  Not chewed up, but chosen.  Not rejected, but restored.  Not a has-been but a shall be. 

4. Addicted to Past Wins: Yes, it’s possible that you stay stuck in the past because you won big time at some point in your life.  Were you most likely to succeed?    Were you big man on campus?    Did you attend the best school?  Make the big bucks in a former position?   Maybe you even got to play in the pros!  Sadly, as the dismal financial, marital and emotional statistics of ex-pro athletes demonstrates, too many continue living on in the past and long for the days when the crowds cheered and the women swooned.  Of course, celebrate the past wins, but don’t forget to plan your present and your future wins.  The truth is, your future wins may be MUCH greater than even your past ones?  Do you believe that?

5. Addicted to Present Worry: Do you can be addicted to the seeming “control” of the toxic thoughts bouncing around in your brain during the day or worse, at night.  Fear and skepticism may even play themselves out in “catastrophising” (playing out catastrophic scenarios) and lead us to hoard, to reject risk, to fear failure and only do what we think is “safe.”  Key question: “Is ‘safe’ really ‘safe?”   How many people never really live because they are in continual pursuit of what’s secure and safe?  I would estimate, that’s most people!  Will that be you too?

OK, I know I may have just opened a can of worms that can’t be closed in a single blog post.  But, as any addict know, we must acknowledge the real problem before we get to a real solution.  We must accept reality before charting a new vision for our future.   

With you on this journey!

www.JeffCaliguire.com

Add to: Facebook | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumbleupon | Reddit | Blinklist | Twitter | Technorati | Furl | Newsvine

Filed under: Uncategorized | 8 Comments »

Don’t Ignore a Bleeding Toe

Posted on June 28, 2010 by jeffcaliguire

When we’re in pain it’s hard to be at our best.  OK, that’s an understatment!  Pain pretty much hampers achieving our dreams, meeting our goals, living in health and building loving relationships.   Pain is almost impossible to ignore.  As William Shakespeare said, “A man with a toothache cannot be in love.” 

I learned this painful lesson the hard way during “freetime”at the Camp of the Woods junior high basketball clinic many years ago.  My pain happened just moments before my friend Billy Lohmeyer made good on his promise to introduce me to the “cute girl on the trampoline.”  I was confident I could use  “suave” approach and casual conversation to at least get to know this ”teenage beauty!”  However, as Billy and I sauntered into the gym with my eyes trained on “her,” my barefooted toe clumsily caught the metal door frame and I ripped the toenail from completely off.  Billy, at first not noticing my pain, continued with the introduction.   My reddened face grimacing, I said, ”Hi… I’m Jeff.”  At that point, Billy, noticing blood liberally spurting from my foot kindly began mopping my trail with an old towel.  As pain began to take over, I held my breath and blurted, “Whelp, nice to meet ya!” I quickly turned and hobbled out the door with Billy following - my blood staining the wood as I limped.  Once outside, I let out a “Yowwwwwwwwwwww!!!” 

Try as I did, I just couldn’t ignore the bleeding toe.  I don’t remember much about the girl nor do I think I ever saw her again. However, my left foot still bares the scar of that fateful introduction and the toenail remains deformed. 

MORAL OF THE STORY as long as you’re in pain, ache or discomfort,  you can’t focus on “higher” things.   Whether that involves enjoying your family, finding significance day-to-day or caring about others in pain.  As long as you’re in pain – the pain pretty much wins the day.  It keeps you from being fully you.

As I now coach people, especially men, I see too many who remain trapped in pain in their area of work/calling/career to have maximum  energy for other pursuits.  I identify. I really knew that pain for many years.   I felt chronic uncertainty, lack of clear mission and outright pain.   It affected me daily as I sought to ignore it by junking out with chips and cookies, sacking out in front of the TV or just  feeling sorry for myself.   Other times, I expressed it by being  too “tired” to play with the kids, picking fights with my wife and on weekends isolating from friends.

I now believe that too many others share my “bleeding toe” in this area of life.  It doesn’t need to remain that way!

Something’s wrong.  Like the bleeding toe, it likely won’t kill you.   And some might argue, at least you’ve still got your eyes, your ears and your limbs  But longterm pain doesn’t foster an ability to “be in love.”   You won’t give your best to those you love, to God, to your work or to yourself as long as you’re in pain in your work. 

If this resonates with you, THERE IS HOPE for something better.  Much better!  But, you can’t just ignore the bleeding toe. 

There is a different way.  The way of calling.  Convergence.  Discovering what you were born to do.    First step: seeking another way.  A new way.  A “stop the bleeding way.”

www.JeffCaliguire.com

Add to: Facebook | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumbleupon | Reddit | Blinklist | Twitter | Technorati | Furl | Newsvine

Filed under: Calling, Career, Development, Leading from Inside Out, Personal Growth | Leave a Comment »

Win by Quitting Dumb Things

Posted on June 25, 2010 by jeffcaliguire

Sometimes the best decisions we can make in our lives and in our organizations involves not what we’re gonna do – but what we’re NOT gonna do.  You may have heard it said that “quitters never win.”  Well, that may not be the case.  Sometimes quitters DO win.  They quit doing dumb things that aren’t working and will never work. 

Win by quitting dumb things. 

As I think back on my experience with the 1981 Tenafly Tigers football team I think quitting a dumb thing may have been the key to our ultimate success.  Though it had been “tradition” for the seniors to beat on, haze and typically “towell-whip” the sophomores -  something wasn’t working.  A 6th place finish in 1980 despite outstanding talent. The year before also in the basement.  Yet, a group of us huddled together and made a fateful decision in the beginning of my senior year: “Are we gonna quit beating on the sophomores this year? We didn’t like it and we ended up hating the seniors, so why keep doing it?  Is it time to quit doing it?”

Of course we were tempted by the rationale to keep doing what we’ve known.  “It WAS done to us.”  “Don’t they expect it?”  “Why change?”   “Tradition is, after all, tradition!”

Yet, we did quit and something magical happened that year.  A mediocre bunch of New Jersey guys with names like “Fief,” “Iggy,” “Guls,” “Bones,” “Hondo,” “Mills” “Hersch” and even “Cal” experienced the thrill of victory…. as a team.  Together, sophomores included, we created a record-setting offense and for the first time in years went to the state finals.  Most memorable to all of us was the day we took on our Thanksgiving Day arch rivals, the Dumont Huskies, with the Bergen Record’s predictions of certain our defeat.  Two touchdowns behind in the first quarter, it looked like the predictions were going to come to pass.  However, when the clock ran out that day, the scoreboard read: Tenafly:36.  Dumont:14. With tears streaming from our dirt-stained faces, we hoisted Coach Joe Spilewski (“Coach Ski”) on our shoulders, then hoisted the trophy.  Next day, the Bergen Record’s headline: “Tiger gridmen maul Dumont in finale.”

Quitting dumb things can make all difference.  Even the difference between ending in the “W” category rather than the “L” category.   

Got any dumb things you and/or your team need to quit?

  • Criticizing behind backs?
  • Worrying rather than letting go?
  • Throwing “good money” after “bad?” 
  • Meetings with no real agenda or creativity? 
  • Hiring staff without a game plan?
  • Going it alone rather than partnering?
  • Working hard without stopping long enough to focus your mission or vision?

Doing the same things over and over again expecting different results is still the best definition of insanity. But it can feel Oh so natural…  and easier than making needed change!   Still – insanity is just that.  Insane! 

What’s NOT working for you? Might it be time to quit.. to bury it… to get rid of it… to let it go?

The team that wins just may be your own! 

www.JeffCaliguire.com

Add to: Facebook | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumbleupon | Reddit | Blinklist | Twitter | Technorati | Furl | Newsvine

Filed under: Calling, Leadership, Leading from Inside Out, Personal Growth, Simple Productivity, Transition | Leave a Comment »

Your Vision of Greatness

Posted on June 23, 2010 by jeffcaliguire

I am coming to believe that too few people have a vision of greatness.  By that, I’m not talking about the cocky, “Look at me!” or the arrogant “I’m better than you!” nor the way I would sign my name on my “great” artworks when I was a ten.  (“Jeff, the Great”.. My wife still kids me about that!)  I’m talking about having a vision of ourselves being the best at something. 

What do you see yourself being not average,  not just good at – BUT GREAT AT? 

Someone who doesn’t have that kind of vision (or isn’t in the right place)

  • will JUST do what they need to get by
  • won’t seek out feedback (may even be defensive)
  • won’t do things to improve when no one’s watching.
  • won’t encourage others to succeed or be their best.

Speaking at our church, Willow Creek, this past Sunday, ex-Chicago Bear linebacker great and current head coach of the San Francisco 49′ers said, “We all want to be great but if you don’t have a vision for it, it won’t happen.  You must have a calling and a burning desire.  That goes beyond skill and even gifting.  Vision, desire and passion are the key prerequisites for success.

As a coach of pro players who’ve obviously demonstrated talent and skill to get where they are, Mike says he would rather coach someone who’s coachable and who has vision than someone who just has talent. 

You have talent.  You have skills.  You have interests.   But do you have a vision for greatness that makes you humble enough and hungry enough to be #1 at what you do?   Do you have the burning desire to not die with any of the music still in you?  Sure, for your own good.  But also for the good of the world who needs your greatness? 

Its time to give up small-minded visions and “I’ll never be anything special” thinking.  Your time for greatness is NOW!

www.JeffCaliguire.com

Add to: Facebook | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumbleupon | Reddit | Blinklist | Twitter | Technorati | Furl | Newsvine

Filed under: Business, Calling, Inspiration, Leadership, Leading from Inside Out, Personal Growth | Leave a Comment »

10 Ways to Restore Your Real Passion

Posted on June 17, 2010 by jeffcaliguire

Let’s face it, even if we know what we’re passionate about and do it regularly, even on the job, sometimes our passion wanes.  We can start to feel “blah” about what we once felt bananas about.  We can feel like we’re hired guns for a paycheck.   We can feel like burnout could just be one more crisis away.

How can you restore your real passion if you realize its starting to slip away?  Here are ten ways:

1. Give away some of what you do regularly: I’ve realized that by giving away coaching or advising to those who can’t afford it keeps me fresh and reminded that I’d do what I do even if I didn’t get paid. And its fun and an education for all involved!  For you might that be going overseas or serving with a non-profit like Doctor’s Without Boarders(medicine), Orphan Network (children), International Teams (the oppressed) or serving on a board?   Or might it be volunteering in your local church or synagogue?  Maybe just finding people who can’t afford you and offering to do it for free with no strings attached will serve you and them. 

2. Invite feedback from those you serve:   Ask them honestly in person or even on a feedback form: “How have I (or my company) helped you? ”  Just being reminded that you really did help them tangibly (saved them money, provided a great experience, really listened to them, offered excellent service or even changed their life) can rekindle your fervor to keep doing what you do best. 

3. Meet with a coach: A good coach can quickly help you get to the bottom of why you’re lacking passion for what you do.  Sometimes its just a simple or a profound question that can make all the difference.

4. Take a vacation:  Sometimes, you just “gotta getta way!”  Given the statistics that most American fail to even utilize their actual vacation time, regularly go without adequate sleep and live with the great burden of real or imagined stress can make a vacation just what the doctor ordered… (AND – DO unplug and turn off the cell, the computer and the Blackberry.) 

5. Attend a conference:  Getting both more education in your passion area, extra motivation or just connecting with others can remind you and refresh you.  Industry conferences can do that.  Or if you’re in a leadership role in a business, church or non-profit, the Willow Creek’s Global Leadership Summit in the first week in August (5-6) offers both spiritual inspiration along with input from leaders including Bill Hybels, Jim Collins, Jack Welch, Tony Dungy, Daniel Pink and Terri Kelly.

6. Read books to rekindle your vision and grow your knowledge:  The more expertise you gain in your area of passion, the more you will be needed and the more you will want to share what you know.  Are you reading any books in your passion area right now?  Why not?  Here’s two I’m currently reading that fire me up:  The Call by Os Guiness (Subtitled ”Finding and Fulfilling the Central Purpose of Your Life.” Written in 1998 and this is my 4th time reading through it with a highlighter!).  The Starfish and the Spider by Ori Brafman and Rod Beckstrom.  (Subtitled “The Unstoppable Power of Leaderless Organizations.”)

7. Get greater clarity on your passion:  If you’re reading these so far and you’re not quite sure what your passion is – make a priority to explore that area.    If you haven’t yet, participate in an Endeavor coaching program.  We’re planning another Endeavor Group Program in September.  Plan to be there and let others know too!

8. Make a two column list: What Currently drains Me/What Currently Energizes Me:  Once you make the list, create a plan to do less of the draining stuff and more of the energizing stuff…even if it takes time to get there! 

9. Play out a passionless scenario: What if I never get to do my passion again?:  Consider this from how this will affect you and how it would leave a void in the world.  Remember that your passion is YOUR passion.  It may just be that you were put on this earth to live out that passion.  Hmmmm…

10. Work for an “Audience of One:”  In other words, do what you do for the applause of God and not for fame, fortune or pats on the back.  (Trust me, performing for others is DRAINING!)   In The Call, Os Guiness says, “A life lived listening to the decisive call of God is a life lived before an audience that trumps all others – the Audience of One…. Living before the Audience of One transforms all endeavors.”

And as my friend Bob Lyman always reminds me:  don’t forget to have fun!

www.JeffCaliguire.com

Add to: Facebook | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumbleupon | Reddit | Blinklist | Twitter | Technorati | Furl | Newsvine

Filed under: Business, Calling, Career, Development, Inspiration, Leading from Inside Out, Personal Growth, Simple Productivity | 1 Comment »

Yes, U R Smart!

Posted on June 9, 2010 by jeffcaliguire

Wrestling with poor performance on high school math, the teenager sulkily tells me, “I’m just not smart!”  “Ugh!” I think – somehow the system has convinced him that what makes “smart,” or “not smart” is equivalent to his grades on Algebra tests.    Poor grades in math = not smart.  

How many others of us out there write ourselves off as “not smart” because we don’t fit the typical definitions?  Who says if we don’t have  aptitudes in things physics, chemistry, engineering, standardized testing, or typical school learning we’re not smart?  Unfortunately, though, we, and our kids, conclude, “I’m not smart.”  How sad.

Believing all of us are 10′s somewhere, might we begin to start broadening and communicating  our understanding of “smart?”  Where else might we be “smart?” and even “smarter” than most?  How about some of these?

Mechanically Smart: You are adept at understanding how things work,  putting them together, figuring out how parts integrate, adjust or manipulate to work best.   

Socially Smart: You navigate the arena or people and can smartly put people at ease in interactions, converse with people you just met quite comfortably, or even remember their names!

Relationally Smart: You can connect deeply and authentically with people and develop long-term friendships or family relationships.  People may confide in you and reach out to you when they need help, guidance or just a good listener.

Business Smart: You know how to create ways to make a profit, organize a company and create opportunities in a market.

Artistically Smart: You have an eye for patterns, colors, and creative design that appeal to others aesthetically and you can create an environment based on your “eye” for that. 

Musically Smart: You can discern, create or produce good music and have an “ear” for sounds that please, inspire or create a certain mood. 

Spiritually Smart: You can discern the voice of God and His way of life and can serve the world through your well-balanced, cared for soul and spiritually wise example. 

Social Media Smart: You know how to communicate, interact and build a network through social media. You might even teach others how to do so.

Heart Smart: You caringly and compassionately feel the pain of others and want to do something to relieve their pain or their problems. 

Those are just a few….   Any fit you?   Your kids?  Your employees?    SO HERE THE MESSAGE: YES, U R SMART!  And as you direct your education, your energies, your self-image and as you overcome your hurdles and inhibitions to utilize your real intelligence, the world will become a better place.  You will become a better you.   A smarter you. 

Don’t let the system tell you or someone you love “you’re not smart!”

www.JeffCaliguire.com

Add to: Facebook | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumbleupon | Reddit | Blinklist | Twitter | Technorati | Furl | Newsvine

Filed under: Calling, Career, Development, Personal Growth, Simple Productivity | 4 Comments »

Following the God of the Path

Posted on June 7, 2010 by jeffcaliguire

I recently spoke to a 20-something intellectual with a Masters in Biology about his religious backround.  “I’m an atheist,” he told me.  “I was kind of raised nominal Buddhism but mostly nothing.  And, being a scientist, its hard for me to believe in something I can’t have real proof for.”

“So, you don’t believe God exists?” I asked. 

“No…. Although….” he paused.   ”I have actually sensed that God has been with me on my path,” he said.  “From when I was young to meeting my fiancée, to my work…  God has guided me.”

Hmmmm.. Contradictory??  God doesn’t exist… but, on the other hand, He has guided me.   As I’ve pondered this I’ve come to think he’s actually in good company with others, many others, especially in the younger generations.  Though many reject the religious ”god” or “gods”  from their past as false or non-existent, they sense the reality of a “God of the Path.”  This “God” leads them, guides them, guards them, opens doors and sometimes shuts them.   He has a plan for their life that He  isn’t always silent or subtle.  

Honestly, in the midst of the mess of my own discontent and experience or religious mumbo -jumbo, I periodically get quiet enough to ask myself, “Jeff, Why do you still believe in God?”   What usually pops into my mind isn’t some kind of Thomas Aquinas logical proof or pat “Just believe!” Sunday School answer.  Instead, I come back to the myriad of times when I’ve experienced, sensed or seen God guiding me along the path.  I actually have a pretty long list!  My wife, Mindy, laughs when she says, “You’ve certainly had more of those appearances than most !” “Yeah, I think I’ve needed them more!”  I tell her.   She doesn’t disagree. 

One example: Last summer, I came to crossroads decision where I not only thought long and hard, but eventually traced out the alternatives on paper and worked out a numeric system with pros and cons.   I was still torn!  After sharing my whole complex process with Mindy, I grabbed a yellow highlighter and highlighted the option that numerically ”won.”  So, Decision made?  No, within minutes, seconds even, I was back to second-guessing and filled with anxious uncertainty.  That evening, we attended a dinner party at a friend’s house where I was introduced to a middle-aged man.   Knowing nothing about me, after just a few minutes of  small talk conversation, this spiritual man looked at me intensely and said, “I feel like I’m supposed to tell you this.  You are at a crossroads right now.  It’s OK. God knows where you are and He has lit up your path. You just need to follow the path He’s highlighted.”    Gulp… The the picture of the yellow highlighter popped into  my mind.  (This wasn’t what I was expecting!!!!)  I looked to the room nearby and realized Mindy might have overheard the conversation.  “Mindy did you hear what he just said?” I asked.  “Yes.” she responded.  “Well, what does it make you think?”  “Well, duh!” she said.  (Sometimes she just has a way with words!) ”What do you mean?” I still questioned. “Jeff, what did you just highlight this morning?” 

Hokus pokus?  Weird?  Bizarre even?  Sure, sometimes truth is stranger than fiction in my life.   And trust me, I have more of those kinds of stories!   Yet, as I coach others at a crossroads in calling, career, or just plain life,   they often share their own “unexplainable” experiences with the “God of the Path.”   It seems so atypical yet as I read the Bible   discover that God very much is said to “directs paths.”   He “leads beside quiet waters.”  (Psalm 23:2).   He tells worried wanderers, “When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned.”  (Isaiah 43:2)    He  ”teaches you what is best for you, (He) directs you in the way you should go.”  (Isaiah 58:17)   And as written in the Psalms, King David’s anxiety melts when he affirms, “The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me”  (Psalm 138:8).

No, I haven’t discarded numeric decision-making, but I have seen faith created by the  ”God of the Path” who sheds light upon the journey and reveals doors I  could never have imagined.    So, do follow that God of the Path.   Don’t miss that adventure!    Don’t dare miss THAT adventure!

www.JeffCaliguire.com

Add to: Facebook | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumbleupon | Reddit | Blinklist | Twitter | Technorati | Furl | Newsvine

Filed under: Uncategorized | Leave a Comment »

Next Page »