"These women can be world changers!" passionately exclaims widow coach and visionary Shelby Ketchen. "They've come through real pain and loss and they can give back and help others."
I asked Shelby if I could share her story of how she went from depressed and thinking her life was over to being a coach and advocate for widows.
"Yeah, they need huge amounts of support. Someone to just walk with them. But sometimes they also need a kick in the pants more than anything. Who better to give that to them than someone who totally gets it!"
Wow! I can't think of many more people I respect more than Shelby Ketchen. Having experienced the devastating loss when her beloved husband Rich died from the complications from diabetes in 2010, Shelby struggled but has now turned to become a wounded healer for those who hurt.
When I think of Shelby, I'm reminded of the line from one of the best movies ever, The Shawshank Redemption. Its the advice that Andy Dufresne gives to Red when looking at the other side of prison, “It comes down to a simple choice, get busy living or get busy dying."
Shelby's deepest passion has emerged because she doesn't want to see other widows lack a path out of the darkness. "I want them to move on sooner. Get back on their feet and find what they can be passionate about."
Though we seldom here about this, the numbers of widows all around us is growing daily and becoming a bigger part of the population in the US.
There are 800,000 new widows each year in the US.
There are 13.6 million widows in the United States. Over 11 million of the widowed, in the US, are women
There are 245 million widows around the world, and
115 million widows are living in devastating poverty
The Bible is quite clear that this problem matters a whole lot to God. "True religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress" (James 1:27)
Of course, there are very few, if any, more painful experiences in life than the loss of a spouse. Yet, this is exactly what Shelby Ketchen sees, has experienced... AND now works to do something about.
From experience Shelby recognizes that many people who go through the death of a spouse
Feel incredibly alone
Feel stuck in fear
Feel family pressure
Live with guilt about still being alive
Lack a vision of a really desirable future.
Most people mean well, but don't know how to handle the surviving widow or know what they really need. "The worst is when they tell you things like 'It was God's will' and 'He's in a better place.' Of course, they think they're being helpful, but they're totally not!"
"Instead of asking what you can do to help... just help! One guy showed up at my house and fixed my disposal!"
Yet, widows desperately need hope. They need to move on and not see their lives as over. "Coming out from the other side is like seeing the sun coming from behind the clouds and feeling the warm sunshine on your face."
Out of the ashes of her grief, Shelby discovered that her own calling was to "make a living making a difference" by writing, coaching and creating a way for widows to move from broken to blessed."
In doing so, she created a 3-step coaching program that offers something very different from counseling. It helps them with:
1. Acceptance of what happened and what's not going to change.
2. Visualization of a future they can feel excited by.
3. Execution of action steps to bridge the gap towards where they need to head to live into a bright future.
By offering this process through coaching, Shelby sees widows taking ownership of their own process, especially the visualization. She sees their being a place that churches or organizations can provide that specializes in this healing and others to walk with them who both understand the pain, but point toward the way forward.
Do you know someone now struggling as a widow? One simple way to help them would be to point them towards Shelby, her resources and her coaching.
Here's the link: http://shelbyketchen.com
Another way to help widows: Shelby created to help widows is in her husband Rich's honor. It's a holiday fund for widows struggling financially http://shelbyketchen.com/2014/11/richard-j-dellarosa-holiday-helper-fund/
OR like Shelby, help by discovering that the story of your own deepest pain may become a way toward hope for someone else!
What Andy said to Red in Shawshank Redemption applies, "Remember Red, hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.""These women can be world changers!" passionately exclaims widow coach and visionary Shelby Ketchen. "They've come through real pain and loss and they can give back and help others."
Are You Ready to Experience Your Purpose@Work? Complimentary Book!
HomeConvergence Consultation (Free!)Books by Jeff CaliguireAboutContact Us
DISCOVER RECENT POPULAR BLOG POSTS!EXPLORE
Calling & CareerPersonal GrowthPurposeful LeadershipProductivityPlatform
CONNECT WITH US
COPYRIGHT 2017 BY CONVERGENCE POINT INC. - POWERED BY HEROIK