When I learned that one of my leadership heroes had a MENTOR, I silently brooded, "Why can't I have one of those?" "Sure would be nice," I thought.
Who of us doesn't need a mentor? Certainly if we define mentor as "someone who teaches or gives help and advice to a less experienced and often younger person" (Mirriam Webster).
Yet, having served rather disappointingly to others as a mentor,and had those I asked to be my mentors wonder if they could really provide guidance in all the areas I needed help in, I now have some different thoughts on this mentoring-thing.
1. No one mentor-person can help us in every area of life. Just really not possible! (career, business, finances, creativity, relationships, spiritual, physical, etc... )
2. It's somewhat awkward when we try to force "mentor-fit" with someone not ready or seeking us.
In her book, Lean In Facebook COO Cheryl Sandberg compares this kind of mentor-expectation to the story of the little bird from the Dr. Seuss book looking all over asking, "Are you my mother?"... Thus: "Are you my mentor?"
"Chasing or forcing that connection rarely works, and yet I see women attempt this all the time. When I give speeches or attend meetings, a startling number of women introduce themselves and, in the same breath, ask me to be their mentor.... The question is a total mood killer."This "GET A MENTOR MOVEMENT" can make us think growth REQUIRES us to have all wise one's in our lives who
1. become the parent-figures we never had.
2. replace trained counselors (help us get unstuck emotionally and relationally),
3. replace trained coaches (help us plan, navigate to our true potential or overcome our roadblocks) and
4. replace trained spiritual directors (help us learn to detect the work of God in our lives.)
THE TRUTH - Most of us don't have and can't find such super-mentors yet we desperately still need wisdom in key areas of our lives to grow to our real potential. (We need insights and input from those further along in some aspect of our journey!)
The great news today, like never before in history we can intentionally be "mentored" by wise people who share their wisdom in key arenas of life.... VIRTUALLY.
I've been amazed by how much I've been able to grow by connecting to the blogs, books, podcasts, webinars, online videos, web courses and online learning communities offered by wise mentors in my field and in other areas where I need guidance. Sure, it would be awesome if I were able to have lunch with them.... but I feel like I now get to be "mentored" by wise "Yoda-Types" like
Michael Hyatt (blogging, leadership and personal and time management)
Jeff Goins (writing)
Lance Wallnau, (spiritual coaching and Biblical integration of life)
Dallas Willard (theology)
Matthew Kelly (psychology and emotions)
Bill Baren (sales)
Tony Robbins (motivation, coaching psychology)
Gregg Stutts (marriage)
Marisa Murgatroyd (branding and marketing)
Mia Davies (video creation)
Ray Edwards (copy creation and pod-casting)
It is NOW possible to get close to these people ways through technology. We don't need to move across the country or even buy a flight to do it! Just decide to study their teachings and learn from them at our own pace!
It was Catholic writer Henri Nouwen who shared how he intentionally chose certain writers to be his mentors and was mentored by them by reading everything they wrote. He saw them as "friends" and got to know how they thought.
So, what areas do you need mentoring in RIGHT NOW?
Who might be your next virtual mentor.... at least until God brings a live teacher right to your doorstep
When I learned that one of my leadership heroes had a MENTOR, I silently brooded, "Why can't I have one of those?" "Sure would be nice," I thought.
Who of us doesn't need a mentor? Certainly if we define mentor as "someone who teaches or gives help and advice to a less experienced and often younger person" (Mirriam Webster).
Yet, having served rather disappointingly to others as a mentor,and had those I asked to be my mentors wonder if they could really provide guidance in all the areas I needed help in, I now have some different thoughts on this mentoring-thing.
1. No one mentor-person can help us in every area of life. Just really not possible! (career, business, finances, creativity, relationships, spiritual, physical, etc... )
2. It's somewhat awkward when we try to force "mentor-fit" with someone not ready or seeking us.
In her book, Lean In Facebook COO Cheryl Sandberg compares this kind of mentor-expectation to the story of the little bird from the Dr. Seuss book looking all over asking, "Are you my mother?"... Thus: "Are you my mentor?"
"Chasing or forcing that connection rarely works, and yet I see women attempt this all the time. When I give speeches or attend meetings, a startling number of women introduce themselves and, in the same breath, ask me to be their mentor.... The question is a total mood killer."This "GET A MENTOR MOVEMENT" can make us think growth REQUIRES us to have all wise one's in our lives who
1. become the parent-figures we never had.
2. replace trained counselors (help us get unstuck emotionally and relationally),
3. replace trained coaches (help us plan, navigate to our true potential or overcome our roadblocks) and
4. replace trained spiritual directors (help us learn to detect the work of God in our lives.)
THE TRUTH - Most of us don't have and can't find such super-mentors yet we desperately still need wisdom in key areas of our lives to grow to our real potential. (We need insights and input from those further along in some aspect of our journey!)
The great news today, like never before in history we can intentionally be "mentored" by wise people who share their wisdom in key arenas of life.... VIRTUALLY.
I've been amazed by how much I've been able to grow by connecting to the blogs, books, podcasts, webinars, online videos, web courses and online learning communities offered by wise mentors in my field and in other areas where I need guidance. Sure, it would be awesome if I were able to have lunch with them.... but I feel like I now get to be "mentored" by wise "Yoda-Types" like
Michael Hyatt (blogging, leadership and personal and time management)
Jeff Goins (writing)
Lance Wallnau, (spiritual coaching and Biblical integration of life)
Dallas Willard (theology)
Matthew Kelly (psychology and emotions)
Bill Baren (sales)
Tony Robbins (motivation, coaching psychology)
Gregg Stutts (marriage)
Marisa Murgatroyd (branding and marketing)
Mia Davies (video creation)
Ray Edwards (copy creation and pod-casting)
It is NOW possible to get close to these people ways through technology. We don't need to move across the country or even buy a flight to do it! Just decide to study their teachings and learn from them at our own pace!
It was Catholic writer Henri Nouwen who shared how he intentionally chose certain writers to be his mentors and was mentored by them by reading everything they wrote. He saw them as "friends" and got to know how they thought.
So, what areas do you need mentoring in RIGHT NOW?
Who might be your next virtual mentor.... at least until God brings a live teacher right to your doorstep?
